If the human being is endowed with consciousness and willingly allows himself to be influenced by his feelings, he possesses a trait of its own: he can control his emotions through self-control.
What would we be without it? Bloodthirsty beasts that respond only to our deepest instincts, without a doubt.
This faculty not to react hastily and without preliminary reflection is to call into question in our everyday lives.
If we are indeed capable of leading it, we are sometimes blinded by events and our demons take over.
This is how, the external manifestations of socially repressed feelings or comportments like anger, violence or rage may emerge.
Self-control then ensues from the assimilation of social boundaries and behaviors to be adopted within one’s environment.
To blossom yourself in your daily life and your environment, it is obvious that you need to know how to fight certain reflexes just like impulsivity.
Here are some tips that will help you never exceed again the bounds and encourage the development of self-control.
1. Self-control through analysis of one’s existence
To develop a balanced psychology, one must be able to submit to introspection.
By analyzing each compartment of your life, you will highlight quickly areas where your ability to control your emotions you are lacking.
Do you have trouble cashing the critics? A pervasive fear of failure or rejection haunts you?
It is by probing your deepest feelings that you will discover the causes of your discomfort and the means to overcome it.
Most people who react violently or who do not manage to make self-control a component of their behavior, have not in fact accepted their weaknesses.
Yet, there is no shame in not tolerating failure or being emotionally delicate. The whole thing is to be aware of that, in order not to explode when these feelings emerge: that is, self-control.
Remember that knowledge is power. Becoming mindful of one’s tendency to overreact is already a first step towards improving self-control.
2. Self-control as the engine of motivation
Once you have identified the elements that can trigger a lack of self-control, you just have to focus on them on a daily basis to transform them into motivating elements.
It is useless indeed to repeat that personal motivation is crucial and lead to personal growth.
If you know that you can be easily riled, it is up to you to exult your anger by means other than confrontation: sign up for a gym, for boxing classes, or take long walks in the forest.
You must find a parallel activity that will allow you to regain some emotional stability.
The negative feelings stagnating within you and which are stimulated by your environment must not become the triggers that activate inappropriate responses.
You cannot insult your boss or slam the door of your relationship for so little.
3. Self-control reinforced by confidence
Relational interactions are made in this way: some people will always be there to try to destabilize you.
So if they succeed, you will always be, unfortunately, the big loser.
On the other hand, if you manage to incorporate the fact that you are better than this, such attempts will only result in demonstrating the childishness of its authors.
Jealous, envious or unhealthy people, you only have to overlook their views.
Self-confidence is precisely this ability to override the gaze of others.
You know who you are and what you want: to preserve this force, this power that represents self-control.
As you know, doubting of yourself undermines your credibility in the eyes of the world and thus weakens self-control: how can you manage to react in an impassive way if you continually take into consideration the judgments of others?
So the answer is found.
To control your emotions, you must let them overwhelm you without retaining them, but without allowing them to dictate your behavior.
Do not ask questions, just be yourself and you will see that the perception of people towards you will change.
It is not difficult to see that somebody is trying to hide its real character and struggle against his feelings.
Self-control is the capability to accept your feelings and incorporate them into your personality to form a whole.
Never forget to keep self-control, you will be able to keep a cool head and act with rationality by relying on your charisma.